In yesterday morning’s Nintendo Direct, the first one in several months, Nintendo of America head Reggie Fils-Aime revealed that several more hit hit titles from their home console would be getting portable ports in the near future. The new lineup includes Super Mario Maker, Yoshi’s Woolly World, and even a new take on the previously […]
The Rebel Rouser News
Bringing you the hard-hitting game journalism news that other sites wouldn’t dare to– and not just because we made it up. This section of totally real-ish news is generally recommended for adult audiences.
TRR: Aussie Pride Featured in Mario & Sonic at the Rio 2016 Olympic Games
In a strong show of diversity and celebration of different world cultures, Sega’s own Shadow the Hedgehog has taken to shouting ‘cunt’ during the Olympic soccer competition, like a filthy fucking bogan. “I started hanin’ out with that echidna, ya know? I mean, I always thought he was a mean fucker, but once you get […]
TRR: Hillary Clinton Finally Finds The Perfect Christmas Gift For Bill: Nintendo’s Balloon Fight
“Don’t tell him, it’s a surprise!” the official Presidential nominee of the Democratic National Convention told us in an exclusive interview after her nomination. The former Secretary of State was using the opportunity to pre-order Nintendo’s upcoming NES Classic Edition on her phone, presumably for her husband and former POTUS himself, Bill Clinton. When asked […]
TRR: Boy Scout Nintendo Reminds Shareholders It Didn’t Make Pokémon Go; Apparently Hates Money
Never one to enjoy a healthy profit margin for long, Nintendo today issued a statement to stockholders reminding the morons that they did not create the hit mobile application Pokémon Go. The result of reminding the powers that be was, of course, that their $3 billion value lead over previous industry leader Sony evaporated in […]
TRR: Final Splatfest is Over; Wii U Loses Only Game Worth Playing
This weekend marked the final Splatfest in Nintendo’s surprise hit Splatoon for Wii U, with Nintendo thugs engaging in squid-on-squid gang warfare over which of the two Squid Sisters they like best. By the time the war was over, Marie had beaten her sister by a tight margin of twenty points, and hundreds of squids had […]
TRR: Sonic Mania Promises A Return to Form for a Fifth Time
Just like Sonic Rush, Sonic the Hedgehog 4, Sonic Colors, and Sonic Generations before it, Sega hopes to go back to the series’ roots for a fifth time to play on peoples’ nostalgia and false expectations for the Sonic franchise. This time, in true 2D. “Fuck it, why not?” Sonic Team head Takashi Iizuka reportedly […]